Growing up in Africa where I come from, a lot of young men feel that it is the sole responsibility of their sisters and mothers to prepare meals and clean up the house while they go out with friends to play soccer|football or do men things. Many grew up believing that as men they are not supposed to enter the kitchen to help fix meals for their families and this has ruined many homes.
That is why we are going to ask our married brothers this honest question today:
“As a married man, when was the last time you did dishes or cooked for your wife and family?”
“In my culture, men are helpful. If my wife cooks, it is a common courtesy that I would clean up the kitchen and vice versa. It does not always work this way and sometimes I might need to cook and clean up or she might need to do this. We both work full-time jobs and have 2 children.” – Mr. M. Banks, an American
“Every day! I don’t do it for her, I just do it. I did those things before we married, why should I stop now? Cooking, doing the dishes, laundry, and housework, in general, are not ‘woman’s’ work they are just working | chores. If ‘shit’ needs to be done, it doesn’t matter who does it just as long as it gets done”. – David Meyer, from London
“I did it all the time for the 30 years we were married. Now I’m thinking of picking up some steaks, dropping in on her tonight, and cooking for her again. Yes, I still see her often. We’re only divorced not disavowed.” – Mr. Golf from Australia
“I don’t cook “for my wife”. I cook for both of us because we need to eat. The last time was two days ago as we always prepare a larger batch to microwave for the next several days. It’s not exactly romantic, but very practical. I don’t think I ever cooked anything only for her specifically. It does not make sense as I also need to eat. As for the dishes – we have a machine for that and as should you. It’s cheaper in the long run, it uses less water, and “washing dishes” is reduced to pushing a button. When was the last time I was the one pushing that button and not my wife? Probably also sometime this week. Oh Yes! Technically you also need to remove the dishes afterward. That’s like 5 minutes of additional work so it’s not just pushing a button.” Mr. Wale from Lagos, Nigeria
“I have been married for about 18 months and we have been together for a few years before that. I have never done the dishes or cooked for my wife. I do however cook for us most days – and do the washing up most days (OK we have a dishwasher – but whatever) but I do it for us not her. I do that because I don’t like sitting still for too long – and can’t cope with someone working when I am sitting around – hence it is easier to cook, etc than watch her do it and have to find something else to do. OH! – And by the way – she is a better cook than me – but she does tend to put things away in the wrong places if she empties the dishwasher (‘wrong place’ being defined as not the place I would have put it!)” – Mr. Micheal from Spain
“I love to do the dishes and cook for my wife. She is a princess and she deserves it. She loves to do the same for me. I believe in a marriage both people should do everything they can to serve each other.” Mr. Ikechukwu from Anambra, Nigeria
“I don’t cook and it’s the responsibility of my wife to cook for me and our children. It’s not the work of a man to do such chores at home. I married her and paid her bride price for her to be my wife and not my boss. I am the man of the house.” – Mr. Obinna from Owerri, Imo State Nigeria
In my final words, you are friends, partners, a beautiful family, and nobody is a slave in his or her home. Work together, live together, cook together, be very reasonable, caring, and understanding. Do your path to make your family happy always. House chores are for every family member. You don’t expect to see your wife, mother, sister, father, husband, uncle, etc in the kitchen after a long day at work while you have been at home all day doing nothing meaningful.
May God Almighty bless our homes and, give us the wisdom to live in peace with one another, Amen.
By: Dr. Sandra C. Duru