Venting is not the same as complaining, but most time it does more harm than complaints. Venting pours out while complaining eats up. When somebody is constantly complaining, or venting about their feelings, it’s easy to think that they just have a negative outlook on life in the same way that a pessimist might. They may not have a negative outlook on life at all, but they still want you to know that nothing is ever quite good enough around them without any complaints about how they carried out the job, assignments or how they solved the problems or fixed situations that ordinarily could be solved quietly without anyone knowing how it was done.
Are you in the habit of giving more information on how things can be done, how you want to do it, and how you did it than the results? Learn to be results-oriented and let your success rate your efforts and sacrifices.
Venting feels great in the moment, but it can actually make you feel worse in the long run. This is because venting can increase your stress and anger rather than reduce them. At the same time, venting doesn’t resolve the underlying causes of your stress or help you in any way to get excellent results. After venting and complaining which most times sounds like a detailed explanation, nothing changes and it makes the person appear to be incompetent or lazy.
Some people just want to vent their feelings without knowing the damage it has on their corporate image and personality. Are you in the habit of giving more complain than results, even when you know that you will end up doing the same thing you are complaining about “unconsciously” after the unwarranted venting or complaining? There are things in life that you have to silently or smartly adjust to accommodate your needs and your set goals without having to make any reference to, or without venting your feelings to the other parties who did not compel you to take up additional jobs, business, classes or other responsibilities that are beneficial to you. So complaining or venting about those things seems rather pointless and may be very damaging to your relationship.
There’re some things you have control over, like your personal life, time, energy, resources, you can fix them, readjust, and still get things done correctly without venting your feelings or complaining about how and what you had to do to get things done. It’s irrelevant and unnecessary to make them count, give the best to whatever you are responsible for. I am still trying to understand the psychology behind this sort of behavior. Is it fear? Are you afraid of trying to change your mindset, personality to fit or afraid of not meeting up to the expectations of the other parties, or afraid of not succeeding? Is it inertia? Do you genuinely want to adjust your life and your style of doing things differently, but can’t find the energy to start? Is it just a way to deflect blame and not have to take responsibility for your own actions and mistakes? I think the problem is negative thoughts, laziness, no proper time management, lack of direction and purpose, clumsiness, low self-esteem, and lack of confidence.
When you start to believe in yourself, you will not have any reason to vent, complain, engage in arguments, or unwarranted explanations of any adjustments or actions taken by you to achieve results. Your job speaks for itself. If you think positive, you feel positive emotions and you get the alert from your brain to hit your target and just get things done without “undemocratic stories”. If you think positively, you feel positive emotions, it shows on your face, and in your interactions, people pick up on it, respond positively, and your life turns around. For someone who is stuck in the cycle of negative thoughts, venting and complaining about how they spend their time, the sacrifices they have to make, how long it took them, and all whatnot, they haven’t
come to this realization yet.
Learn to get things done with little or no complaints about the adjustments made. It discourages people who have great things to do with you, and no matter how good you are, you may be avoided. It can be painful to deal with, but it’s one of those things people often have to identify, accept, and often have to come to on their own. The simple solution is to adjust without venting, complaining, or having to tell the story of what you gave up to get this or that done. Good-looking results tell the story of your sacrifices and bring more compensation.